James Ormond and Mark Waugh
James Ormond had just come out to bat on an ashes tour and was greeted by MarkWaugh........
Mark : "F*ck me, look who it is. Mate, what are you doing out here, there's no way you're good enough to play for England "
James: " Maybe not, but at least i'm the best player in my family"
Rod Marsh and Ian Botham:
When Botham took guard in a Ashes match, Marsh welcomed him to the wicket with the immortal words: " So how's your wife and my kids?"Botham replied "Wife's good but your kids are retards".
Viv Richards to Gavaskar:
Gavaskar had decided to relinquish his opening position and come in at no 4 for that test. But, Malcolm Marshall fired out Anshuman Gaekwad and Dilip Vengsarkar for ducks, setting the stage for Gavaskar to walk in at 0/2.And he thought there would be less pressure! Viv Richards says, "Man, it don't matter where you come in to bat, the score is still zero."
Team mates Sledging :
England were playing Pakistan and, at what turned out to be a crucial moment later on, Frank Tyson managed to get an outside edge off a Pakistani batsman after the batsman had been frustrating them on a hot sweaty day. The ball went right through the hands of Raman Subba Rao who was standing in first slip and through his legs. After the over Raman heads over to the bowler and says, "Sorry Frank, I should've closed my legs."
Frank Tyson, who didn't find any of this amusing, quipped back, " No, you bastard, your mother should have ."
Merv Hughes Vs Cronje
Merv Hughes was one of the greatest exponents of the fine "art" of sledging. Once during a tour game in South Africa Hughes was bowling to Hansie Cronje . It was an especially flat wicket and Cronje was hitting Hughes for fours and sixes all over the place.
After the umpteenth boundary, Hughes headed down the pitch, stood near Cronje, let out a fart and said: "Try hitting that for six." It was five minutes before the guffawing stopped and play could resume.
McGrath to Ramnaresh Sarwan:
Sarwan, the West Indies vice-captain, and McGrath went toe-to-toe in an ugly shouting match in Antigua in May 2003, The incident was sparked after Sarwan, on his way to a match-winning second-innings century, reportedly reacted to lurid taunts from McGrath
Sarwan, the West Indies vice-captain, and McGrath went toe-to-toe in an ugly shouting match in Antigua in May 2003, The incident was sparked after Sarwan, on his way to a match-winning second-innings century, reportedly reacted to lurid taunts from McGrath
McGrath: "So what does Brian Lara's d*ck taste like?"
Sarwan: " I don't know. Ask your wife. "
Viv Richards v Greg Thomas
This incident took place during a county championship match between Glamorgan and Somerset.
Glamorgan quickie Greg Thomas had beaten Viv Richards' bat a couple of times and informed the legendary West Indian ace: " It's red, round and weighs about five ounces, in case you were wondering ."
The very next ball was given the King Viv treament and smashed out of the ground, into a river - at which point Richards piped up: " Greg, you know what it looks like. Now go and find it ."
McGrath Vs Brandes (
In a showdown of best pacers of two countries, Brandes made up for his complete absence of batting skills by some displaying some great sense of humor and presence of mind.Aussie paceman Glenn McGrath was bowling to Zimbabwe number 11 Eddo Brandes - who was unable to get his bat anywhere near the ball. McGrath, frustrated that Brandes was still at the crease, wandered up during one particular over and inquired: " Why are you so fat?"
Quick as a flash, Brandes replied: "Because every time I make love to your wife, she gives me a biscuit ."
Bill Lawry & Richie Benaud
While commentating during a match in which Pakistan was faring badly in all departments of the game, Bill Lawry, offering a solution said "I think Pakistan's problem is they've got to relax", to which
Benaud replies nonchalantly, "I don't agree. I think Pakistan have got to learn how to bat, bowl and field. It's a simple game."
Robin Smith & Merv Hughes
During 1989 Lords Test, Smith plays and misses a few, at which Hughes comments: "Robin, you can't f**king bat". As luck would have it, Smith dispatches the next ball to the boundary and replies "Hey Merv, we make a fine pair. I can't f**king bat & you can't f**king bowl."
Steve Waugh & Parthiv Patel
This happened during India's tour of Australia in 2001. The series was level at 1-1. It was the 5th and final test at Sydney and India was 4 wickets away from a historic series victory on Aussie soil. However, the aussie Captain, Steve Waugh was proving a thorn in India's back. Playing in his last test match (as he had announced retirement), he mounted a rear-guard action and was fighting for a draw, and was the only one who stood between India and victory. In an attempt to induce him to do something foolish, the 16 year old Indian wicket keeper chirps " Hey Steve, how about one of those famous slog sweep of yours before you leave forever?". Waugh, a veteran of such tactics replied " Sonny! You better show some respect! You were pooping in your diapers when I made my debut"
Sunil Gavaskar
Once, during the tour of West Indies, a young bowler was trying to get under Gavaskar's skin by sledging. Gavaskar, a senior player retorted "Son, don't waste time sledging at me. I have been sledged at more often than you have taken a piss".
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